So here is another piece of writing that I've been working on. I hope it helps those who read it understand what it's like to have a child with emotional disabilities.Unfortunately many fail to look at Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and Oppositional Defiance Disorder as disabilities, but rather something that can be handled by discipline and a change in diet. Please if you read this blog, also read my previous poem called "The Monster Inside" as this Disability is as real as any other.
Perfect
His first breath, first cry, first glance up into my eyes,
His first suckle, his first cuddle, these are the bonds that
ties,
His ten little fingers, and ten little toes,
Cute little button nose.
How I love each part of you,
I stare at you day one day two,
Perfect in all
that you do.
The first little giggle,
Rolling over with a wiggle,
Soon you will crawl,
I think I am going to bawl,
Is that your first tooth?
He’s been so hard to sooth.
Please don’t cry,
Mommy’s going to try.
To be perfect in
all I do,
When it comes to raising you.
His first words, his first steps,
His first fall, when running down the hall.
He’s so upset, I cannot stop the tears,
Is he frustrated, upset or is this because of fears?
I try to help, make things right,
But now he’s trying to bite.
I try to keep him safe from harm,
Don’t want him to break an arm,
While he throws his little body into the walls,
Drags his forehead while he crawls,
Is this normal, is this right?
It’s just his personality, he’s alright.
You’re my perfect
little man,
You’ll grow out of this I know you can!
The doctor says no problems, nothing’s wrong,
Like other’s his age, he’s growing up strong.
Children are all different, develop in their own way.
Don’t worry everything will be okay.
I remember those words and think of them every day,
But deep inside I wonder,
Keeping notes and I ponder,
That I may need to prepare,
For challenges to beware.
He sleeps through the night,
He always has until it’s light,
He wakes and demands to wear all his ties,
One will not do, or he gets tears in his eyes.
Then we must find him his rubber balls,
Look everywhere, put out the calls,
One in each hand, never will he part
Or he will cry like I’ve broken his heart.
Don’t worry son, I will take care,
To keep a good supply, as rubber balls aren’t rare!
I think to myself, this may be odd,
But he’s still perfect
even though a little flawed!
As days turns into months and then to years,
There seems to be more anger and fears,
Temper tantrums turned to rage,
Not like other boys his age.
Needing things a certain way,
Especially when and how to play.
What he’ll eat and how it’s prepared,
It must be perfect,
nothing can be compared.
He’s so impulsive, fearless and untamed,
Always feels he’s free from being blamed.
I’m being told he isn’t right,
Even though he is quite bright!
Is this just behavioral or something more?
Is my parenting very poor?
What should I do, where should I go?
How can this be?
Why did this happen to me?
Could my child have special needs?
I’ve done the research, and yes indeed,
He has something called ADHD, struggles with ODD.
The doctors access and they’ve agreed,
Perfect I say, now
let’s start a plan
I promised him I would do all I can.
To give him every chance in life,
To live his days with little strife.
I am so proud of my little man,
He is so brave, I am his biggest fan.
How I love each part of you,
PERFECT in all you
do!
